For the best part of four years I put my life on hold.
I was waiting for something, anything, to jolt me into action, but it never came.
I thought about switching careers, but I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do.
I thought about going travelling again, but I didn’t know how I’d make it work financially.
I eyed up several courses but told myself I wasn’t ready to enrol on them yet.
And so I waited, I stayed in the same place, and hoped for a pay rise every year that would allow me to save just that little bit more to be ‘prepared and safe’ to go and do something different.
But being 100% ‘ready’ never came.
It never does when we’re stuck and afraid of taking action, because when we’re living in limbo, we end up spending more money trying to make ourselves feel happier with things we don’t need so we can survive in that particular gear, and in turn we actually physically block the good things we’re looking for from coming into our lives.
I’ve learnt to notice when I migrate ever so gradually back into my ‘blocking’ mode, and lately I caught myself repeating my pattern all over again.
My partner and I have been discussing getting a cat for aaaaaaaaaaaaaagggggges.
It was a done deal and then it wasn’t, and then it was, and then it was off again, namely because of my inability to decide on what was best.
The truth is I was scared. Scared of what it meant to invest in a pet together.
I know, I know, it’s just a cat for goodness sake, but still, it’s a commitment, and like it or not, I’ve had to realise that I do have several commitment issues that tend to raise their ugly head in my relationship at times.
I have pretty much pinpointed where they have come from over the years; my parent’s turbulent divorce, being cheated on by a long term partner, being suffocated with responsibility by another.
And for the most part, I’ve gradually learnt to understand some of these issues and let them go (versus my previous pattern of not letting anyone get close to me), and so at first I thought that’s what this hesitation was.
We couldn’t get a cat because it was too big a commitment.
Except that wasn’t what was going on here.
What was happening was that I was doing it again.
I was trying to put my life on hold, yet again.
I was waiting to be ‘ready’ to have a pet, perhaps living elsewhere, somewhere bigger, feeling more settled, later, when it felt like a less hectic time.
I was telling myself we weren’t ready for an upheaval like this because what about my plans to travel and take my business on the road? What about my partner’s thoughts about later doing the same? What would happen to the cat? Aghhhh it was all too much for my brain to process whilst I was trying to sort the rest of my life and business out.
But I was holding up a giant metaphorical hand and blocking, blocking, blocking (even though a cat or dog has been on my vision board and in my dreams to own one again for years).
And something fundamental and kind of sad happens when we attempt to put our lives on hold or when we wait to be ‘ready’.
We block joy.
We block abundance.
And we often block love.
And in a world where there is already enough stress and responsibility, it’s kind of laughable that we would want to block these emotions from coming in right?
I mean, who doesn’t want to feel happy?
Who doesn’t want to feel abundant?
Who doesn’t want to feel full up with love?
My point here is that if you’re waiting for the ‘perfect’ time to do something, start something new, change something or bring something into your life, please stop waiting.
Because I can tell you right now that the ‘perfect’ time doesn’t exist.
Of the many lessons I’ve learnt on this entrepreneurial road, one of the biggest is that being ‘100% ready’ never arrives in reality.
The things that are certain and real are change, adaptation, and movement.
Our lives are constantly changing, moving, adapting and evolving and there is nothing we can do to stop them.
So the more we stand still, the longer we stay stuck and the more we try to resist change and block something new from coming in that we don’t feel we’re adequately ‘prepared’ for, the more we are going to feel the opposite of what we actually want to feel.
The more we are going to feel in struggle versus flow.
The more we are going to feel constricted instead of expansive.
And the more we are going to feel powerless instead of powerful, not to mention frustrated.
Because if we’re not opening ourselves up to flow and allowing what we want to come in, despite the busy, chaotic way that it may arrive, nothing is ever going to change for us.
So stop putting your life on hold, it’s going to be over sooner than you know.
Stop waiting for the right time, it’s never going to arrive.
The ‘right’ time is now, life is happening now, and what you seek is waiting for you to find it NOW.
The question is, can you drop your guard for a moment to simply take a breath, and let it all in?
I encourage you to become curious about what you’re waiting for right now.
I invite you to take a deep breath and be honest with yourself about what it is you really want, and yet have been telling yourself you’re not ready/qualified/financially viable enough (insert other inappropriate limiting belief here) to do yet?
Don’t let waiting for the right time be the story you end up telling.
You don’t have to put your life and your happiness on hold.