I felt compelled to write to you about something that’s not only been cropping up among my private clients lately, but also within myself.
And this one can be a deadly killer.
A poison if you will.
It’a familiar theme that if you look back, can be found running through my personal history and I fear it’s the same for many of us, especially women.
So what am I talking about here? COMPARISON.
Yep, I know you’ve been experiencing this lately too.
I know you’ve been asking yourself the same questions…
“How comes it just seems to come so easily to some people but not to me?”
“Why is it I seem to be finding things more of a struggle than other people?”
And the big one…
“Everyone else is doing so much, surely I should be further along the road than I am now?”
As an entrepreneur or business owner, it can be tempting to compare our journey to the ones we see unfolding (seemingly so beautifully and seamlessly) around us.
And who can blame us right? I mean, this journey that we’re on is down-right confusing!
We’re doing it mostly alone in the beginning and we often have days when despite a lot of knowledge to the contrary, we tell ourselves we have no idea what we’re doing, we massively get in our own way, and we can also even have some days when we consider throwing in the towel and giving it all up completely.
And I can guarantee you that if you’re having one of those days today, the chances are you’ve spent at least a small portion of today comparing your work, your decisions and your business to somebody else that you admire.
But let me tell you right now, comparison is a killer.
It will stop you dead in your tracks, kill your creativity, and numb your poor already over-worked brain.
It is definitely not your friend!
And we’re all guilty of doing this, as I said, I have been speaking to several clients about this lately, but the reason I’ve probably picked up on it so strongly is also because I’ve recognised it lately within myself as well.
Call it feeling run down from a cold, name it as the time of the month, but whatever the reason, it’s still cropped up for me recently.
You see, I have several friends who are beautiful writers, and I mean really, really talented writers.
Their posts are always amazing, their subject lines grabbing, and they have been published on some awesome platforms.
I read their words in admiration and awe, completely inspired, so excited for them, but sometimes, there is a little voice that says…
“Damn, I’m never going to be as good a writer as that.”
You might be wondering why I experience this voice if I’m a writer myself, in the middle of writing a book, and if I’m also coaching clients on trying to turn down the volume on these very voices.
The reason? Because I’m human.
We ALL experience and hear these kinds of voices.
Some days they are barely whispers.
Other days they are so loud they are like a screaming, attention-seeking toddler wrapping itself around your ankles.
The point is, they will always be there, no matter who you are, and wherever you are on your journey, in some form.
The choice you can make that will allow you to deal with the voice of comparison?
To CHOOSE to think differently about that voice.
It’s up to you to CHOOSE to believe that what your ego is telling you isn’t true.
You see, your ego is a powerful thing. It can build you up, but it can also knock you right back down into your ‘rightful place’ just as quickly.
So it’s up to you to rise above that ego and KNOW that no matter what, comparison is not going to serve you.
Because you KNOW that whatever you do, whatever work you decide to put out in the world, and whatever way your journey unfolds will be TOTALLY different to the ones you’ve been comparing yourself to.
It doesn’t mean it will be better.
It doesn’t mean it will be worse.
It doesn’t mean it will be more powerful, or less powerful.
What is important is that it will be YOURS.
100% authentically, unedited, wholly and truthfully YOURS.
So let go of comparing yourself to others. Just let it go.
Because as long as you’re staying true to yourself, what you need, and what YOU want?
As long as you’re following your own path, finding the fun and lightness in what you do, and listening to the inner callings of YOUR soul and no one else’s?
Then comparison is going to feel like a very strange acquaintance when she next drops back in for a cup of tea, because quite frankly, you’re doing so well right now, you know deep down that you just don’t need her anymore.